I recently travelled from Memphis to New Orleans on a paddle-steamboat - The American Queen. Part of the adventure was ordering food when away from the boat. Some of the menu items turned out to be quite unexpected.
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Memphis
A feature of the Peabody Hotel in Memphis is the ducks which are brought from their roof-top home every day at 11 am and 4 pm to swim in the fountain of the hotel atrium.
The Peabody Coffee Shop and Restaurant 11.30 am
- Good mornin’ ma-am. My name’s William. What’re y’all havin’?
I looked round but there was no one else nearby.
- Just me here.
- Welcome ma-am. Make yourself at home. Here is the lunch and brunch menu.
- Thanks William.
- What would you like?
- I’ve had breakfast. Could I have lunch? What do you recommend?
- Well – I’m not sure what might be best for you.
How about Nitty gritty chicken wings, ma-m? Or our special bacon biscuits with gravy?
- Do you have anything with vegetables or salad?
- Our collard greens fondue is popular ma-am – served with pitta bread.
- Fondue?
- Yes, sauteed with a cup of butter.
- Um…… not sure. Any salad?
- How about a wedge salad ma-am?
- Can you tell me what that is?
- It’s a lettuce with plenty of fixins.
- Fixins?
- Fruit ‘n all. Sauces – Ranch, Truff N Stuff, Candied Pecans, Caesar, Lemon pepper, blue cheese.
- I’ll have a wedge salad with Caesar.
- Any Protein? Bacon? Shrimp? Catfish?
- Catfish please .. and Coffee.
- Drip?
- Oh, I see, yes – the coffee..........drip will be fine thank you.
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Bourbon Heat – French Quarter New Orleans
- Good day ma-am. What can ah get ya to drink?
- Mineral water please.
- O…K….ah think we have Perrier. Lemon with it?
I’d begun to accept that ordering a non-alcoholic drink might provoke a pitying sideways look. ‘She must have a problem.’
- Yes but a small amount of ice.
It seemed every soft drink came with a pint glass full to the brim with ice.
- O…K…..I’ll be back shortly
Mick brought the bottle and put down the glass. The kitchen hadn’t taken heed.
- You from Canada?
- No, London, England
- I’ve always wanted to go there. Maybe I will – I’ve just sold my house to Beyonce’s niece for a million so maybe I can get there.
- Brilliant! You’ll enjoy it.
- I’ve done lots of things before this. We’ve all done porn. (he gestured at the other waiters) I used to be quite a looker. Then I put on loads of weight. Turning it around now. I’ve lost 40 pounds.
- Well done! How did you do that?
- Oh - I stopped eating fried food and carbs.
- That can’t have been easy.
- No it wasn’t – no more po’boys or battered shrimp.
- What do you have instead?
- Blackened shrimp – much better. Just tossed on the grill.
- Sounds good – I’ll have some of that.
- Yes ma-am, then I’ll show you where Preservation Hall is.
Later that day (getting
on for 4pm)
The best laid
plans……are meant to be ignored. I’d been joined by my companion from the
American Queen. She was one of the passengers like me who had come for the jazz and the
fun. Even more surprising to the other regular cruise ship travellers, we were
happy to explore on foot rather than take a bus tour.
We’d stopped at the
Café du Monde, had beignets and coffee and watched the band in front of St
Louis (pronounced with an ‘s’) basilica in Jackson Square.
Decatur, French Quarter - Crescent
City Brewhouse
The Brewhouse on
Decatur looked convivial – we sat at the bar and Gabriel came to serve us. My rule of thumb ‘No booze until after 6’ was
easy to get round. It had been 6 o’clock probably (I’d lost track by then) seven
hours ago in Blighty.
My companion had a
flight of beer set up in front of her. I’d decided it was time for a bit of Southern
Comfort. When it arrived, I looked at the huge measure in my glass and this
time I was grateful for the mountain of ice to sip with it. After a while we
decided a little snack would be in order.
From that point on I
realised the combination of alcohol and jet lag had made my vocabulary revert
almost entirely to the vernacular. More particularly I had become unable to get
to the point. Some would say ‘No change there then’.
Gabriel did his best
- We thought we’d have a little snifter
- Sorry ma-am?
- No I mean some food, but not too much.
- Do you mean a starter perhaps ma-am?
- Exactly
- Boudin balls? With mustard and relish.
- Um….
I looked at my
companion but she was deep in conversation with the lads on the other side of
her…….something about the merits of stopping in Bali on the way to Oz. Gabriel
was continuing to do his best.
- Ma-am you might like Hush Puppies.
Then I got started.
- Oh you have Hush Puppies here too! We have them in England in fact they are made out of leather – they’re very naff …..well they were OK but…..in fact when I was a kid ….. a very long time ago…….we had to wear Start Rite sandals and they were made by the same firm……..Clarks…… a family firm…they nearly went of business…..
Gabriel was nodding and
smiling and trying to keep up. Probably hoping for a sign that I was about to
order. But I kept talking.
- ….so Hush Puppies were what creepy men with moustaches wore……probably to match their sheepskin coats….and cavalry twill trousers……….until Oasis. You heard of Oasis?
Gabriel nodded again. He was endlessly patient.
- They were brothers…. O’Sullivan ….no I’m wrong…. Gallagher. Madchester. The Hacienda. And one of them started wearing Hush Puppies and bucket hats and ‘Bingo’ that put them back in contention…….Suddenly all the trendies were queueing up at the boring old Clark’s shoe shops to get some Hush Puppies. Would you believe it – yes and even Start Rite sandals came back in to fashion…………………………….What were you saying?
- We have Hush Puppies here.
- Oh yes…
- They’re crab croquettes served with a remoulade
- Oh marvellous – we’ll have some of those. Can I take your picture?
Notes and glossary
A ‘flight’ of beer is a selection of
different beers to taste in small glasses.
In this case it was six all made in the microbrewery. (Apparently the ‘flight’ becomes a ‘growler’ when it reaches 16.)
Biscuits are what we would call scones, and cookies are what we would call biscuits. Plenty of biscuits are savoury (cheese, ham. chicken) and served with white or brown gravy. White gravy is thin white sauce with lardons or onions to flavour.
Shrimp is usually spoken of in the singular but is served in generous numbers. It or they is/are what we would call prawns and is/are large and scrumptious and is/are caught locally (Gulf of Mexico).
Grits (are or is?) cornmeal porridge.
Po-boy – this is a massive sandwich in what looks like a baguette but is made of softer bread. Origin ‘poor boy’……. I didn’t like to ask why.
Chips are crisps and Fries (sometimes French) are what Brits would call chips.
Hush Puppies originate in America. Here’s the logo.
'Hush Puppies' is a phrase thought to have come from Confederate soldiers hiding from Yankee forces, keeping their dogs quiet. Yes seriously.
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